I'm pretty sure I'll be okay.

sally's xanga is all about not knowing. "I hate not knowing" But I don't know. Not knowing could be worse. I'd rather not know right now that after graduation i'm going to starve/freeze to death come wintertimes. But right now, even though I don't know where I'll be or what I'll be doing or how I'll be living, I can rest pretty confident that I'll be okay.

road trip

Today a couple of friends & I went on a road trip. to iowa. to Target. and now, after such a great time, Josh just sprayed me with a water bottle. That bastard.

yeah. like this is going to work.

I'm trying out journaling.

hey hey good lookin'

Thanks for your comments, you guys.

Okay, so honestly. I'm feeling a little better this evening because the pressure of the paper prospectus is gone. I finished writing the damned thing at 4 am. turned it in at 9 am. Talking about the project went a lot better than writing about it and I'm not really sure if that's a good thing or not.

I'm pretty sure it's a solid topic to do research in but I just hope I can pull it off. I <3 Islam (uhibhu). Well, as much as a non-muslim can.

okay. it's late. i'm tired. meeting with UCS tomorrow. i'm safe and good. i promise.

something happier.

I stole this from Elle.

1. Your name spelled backwards.
Anad.

2. Last incoming call on your phone.
I’m pretty sure it was about an international student. or for my roommate. whatever.

3. What is the last thing you downloaded onto your computer?
“Grim News (But Happy)” The Grim Hall newsletter

4. What’s your favorite restaurant?
Great Wall. mmm delivery Chinese food (General Tso’s!)

5. Last time you swam in a pool?
Last semester for Mil Sci.

6. Have you ever been in a school play?
Yes. Arsinic and old lace. I was darn crappy.

7. 2 or 3?
3 because 2 is just strange.

8. Type of music you dislike most?
I can listen to almost anything. I have an incredibly high tolerance. But yet, I’m really picky to what I actually want to listen to that varies by whim according to my mood. so basically, I have no idea.

9. Do you have cable?
The dorm has cable. So I end up watching too much Judging Amy.

10. Have you ever ridden on a 4 wheeler?
No.

11. Have you ever made a prank phone call?
I think a friend did from my phone. does that count?

12. Boyfriend/Girlfriend?
some people are thick. that’s all.

13. Would you go bungee jumping or skydiving?
Bungee jumping, maybe.

14. Farthest place you ever traveled?
uh. Morocco.

15. Do you have a garden?
No and no thank you!

16. What’s your favorite comic strip?
The Academy @ theacademy.keenspace.com

17. Do you read a newspaper every day?
No. I try to check the bbc online and occasionally others as well.

18. Do you really know all the words to your national anthem?
First verse only. (amen)

19. Bath or Shower, morning or night?
shower, generally in the middle of the day.

20. Best movie(s) you’ve seen in the past month?
I don’t know if I’ve seen a movie in the past month. But, I’ll put a plug in for Osama here. Watch it, damn it!

21. Favorite pizza toppings?
pepperoni and mushroom (unless you’re in morocco, then cheese, mushrooms and corn. dead serious, people)

22. Chips or popcorn?
popcorn

23. Have you ever smoked peanut shells?
WTF, mate?

24. Have you ever been in a beauty pageant?
no. hamdulilla.

25. Orange Juice or Apple Juice?
Orange.

26. Who were the last people you went out to lunch or dinner with?
the ‘men. the fresh-men. Grimmie freshmen rock.

27. Favorite type chocolate bar?
Reese’s cups. I don’t care if you don’t count them as “chocolate bar” because you’re stupid.

28. When’s the last time you voted at the polls?
2004. presidential elections.

29. Last time you ate a homegrown tomato?
I didn’t like tomatoes when I had them homegrown. So I don’t think I’ve ever had one.

30. Have you ever won a trophy?
Sure, I jumped a bunch in pre-school and got one. I don’t know… something about a rabit.

31. Are you a good cook?
Hells no. I convinced a friend to help me learn this semester. I’m bribing her with my final results. good thing she likes to cook.

32. Do you know how to pump your own gas?
uh. duh.

33. Sprite or 7-Up?
sprite. (and I’d say vodka. mmm future alcoholics)

34. Have you ever had to wear a uniform to school/work?
I had to wear a red polo and khaki pants at the grocery store. Though I kinda like the idea of uniforms.

35. Last thing you ate?
Dr. Pepper & ice cream.

36. Ever thrown up in public?
I haven’t thrown up since fifth grade. thankyouverymuch! but yeah. that time, it was at school. in the lunchline. and the cottage cheese I had eaten for breakfast.

37. Would you prefer being a millionaire or finding true love?
true love.

38. Do you believe in love at first sight?
I agree with Elle. Could happen, but I don’t see it happening with me. I, myself, am too thick for that. I need to know people really well before I can even think about crushes.

39. Can ex’s be just friends?
Hell if I know.

40. Who was the last person you visited in the hospital?
I don’t remember. maybe my grandfather? but that was a VERY long time a go. Possibly Steve, but that would have been at the academy (say four years ago)

41. Did you have long hair as a young kid?
of course! (of course, I still do)

42. What messages are in your voice mail?
I have one. I never delete voice mail. they delete themselves after a while. this one’s from Sunday. about international students.

43. Where would you like to go right now?
the middle east. Colorado. new york. boston. Moscow. beiruit. Dubai. wherever.

44. What was the name of your first pet?
Kayto.

45. What kind of bag do you have, and what's in it?
Timbuck2. school stuff.

46. What was the last thing you drank?
Dr. Pepper.

47. What is one thing you are grateful for today?
it didn’t suck as bad as yesterday.

48. What do you think about most?
senior sem and a stupid boy.

49. What is your new years resolution?
I don’t know. I don’t care.

i may be falling apart.

It started yesterday. In the morning.

... Well, it may have started before then. It's the second week of class and I'm stressed out beyond all reasoning. I can't concentrate on school. I have a huge project that I'm working on all semester. I just can't get started on it. I can't get into it. Every time I begin to read for it, I freeze up. Of course, I blame it on other people distracting me. But honestly, I wouldn't be able to read if i were alone.

It's the second week of school, and I want to skip class.

I'd say I had an anxiety attack yesterday, but I still have this thing where I just don't think I have it that bad. I know I don't. My life is fairly easy. I may be depressed. But this is just unreal.

I must just be fine.

i love you, i love you, i love you, i love you.

these words are my own.... i love you i love you i love you i love you! (wait a second... did she just say hyperbole? it's hyperbole. oh, you know the difference between wrong and right, repsectively)

i don't know if i can like this song anymore. but damn, it's catchy... i love you!

cities

Marrakesh and New York are actually very similar, except Marrakesh has more cycles, probably due to New York's subway system and the people are nicer, probably because they realize that they need tourism money to survive. Also, what New York has in height Marrakesh makes up for in closeness together.

fyi

i'm well & good in ny, ny.